There is no perfect
relationship because no one has perfect communication skills. But the ability
to communicate is the one thing that must always be present for a relationship
to last. Getting the right skills to effectively communicate cannot happen
overnight. There needs to be a lot of work done and a lot of time needs to be
invested. So to help you get started, here are the top three communication
strategies in a relationship that you must learn to master.
Better your Listening
Skills.
In a relationship, listening
should be a passive skill. What does this mean? It means you should not select
what you want to hear by interjecting or cutting your partner in the middle of
a sentence. Rather, you must listen to everything that is said and even to the
unsaid parts. You will can tie together what your partner wants to establish by
hearing the words and understanding the non-verbal cues. It is also important
that you show your partner that he/she has your full attention by making eye
contact and offering encouraging gestures.
Acknowledgement is a Part of
and You Should Keep That in Mind.
You can acknowledge verbally
or non-verbally. You can nod or shake your head, say "uh-uh" , yes or
some other fillers that would serve this purpose. The goal of acknowledgement
is to let your partner know that you are listening and that you are on the same
page with him/her. If you master this skill, then you have mastered one of the
communication strategies in a relationship.
In fact, most fights in a
relationship would have been avoided if only you acknowledged the other person
in a timely and effective manner. One key method to end a misunderstanding is
to acknowledge the other person by repeating what was said. After which, you
add your own sentiments and how you feel. This way, your partner knows that you
were listening and at the same time, he/she would feel that you really care.
Asking questions or
clarifications is also another form of acknowledgment. Sometimes, if something
is difficult to digest, you paraphrase. In most cases, saying the words of your
partner will bring you to a "light bulb moment" or a moment of
enlightenment. But when you're paraphrasing, try not to sound sarcastic because
that will only call for a closing of doors - possibly forever.
Feelings vs. Problems: Where
Do You Draw the Line?
If you argue with your
emotions and take the fight to a more personal level, you'll only end up
hurting each other even more. The most logical thing to do in a lover's quarrel
is to stick to the issue. Yes, your partner may not do this but you have to. Be
the stronger one in your relationship and steer the conversation back to the
main issue whenever it begins to go astray.
When communicating with a
partner, it is best to express your feelings first. For instance, you can say
“I feel sad…” and then add in your reason. By doing this, you are showing your
partner that you share the same feelings. Complications may arise if one person
in the relationship feels really strong emotions but the other person does not.
Communication is very
important in a relationship; and the number of breakups and divorces because of
communication should serve as enough proof of this. The problem is, no one is
an effective communicator by themselves. There needs to be some work done and
that is where these communication strategies in a relationship would come in. Click to read more inspirational relationship articles...
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